If the bill passes, can we really expect the first impoverished alien unable to pay the fee or fine under its provisions will be sent summarily home? More likely, he will appear on the 6 o'clock news as a victim of American mean-spiritedness and racism -- and thereby instead win a reprieve or an outright apology.

Congressional supporters of the present legislation themselves often engage in politics of the most cynical kind. Rare "bipartisan" cooperation on the bill, which brought Sen. Trent Lott from Mississippi to the side of Massachusetts Sen. Ted Kennedy, is hardly statesmanship or a sudden outbreak of civic virtue. Rather, it is a new public face to the old alliance between profit-minded employers (and those who represent their interests) and demographically obsessed liberal and ethnic activists.

The former want assurances there will be millions of aliens available to work at wages Americans will not -- with ensuing medical, housing, schooling and legal costs subsidized by the taxpayer. The latter can't wait for more constituents in need of representation who, they hope, will someday support them at the polls.

Most cynical of all, however, are the moralistic pundits, academics and journalists who deplore the "nativism" of Americans they consider to be less-educated yokels. Yet their own jobs of writing, commenting, reporting and teaching are rarely threatened by cheaper illegal workers.