Wednesday - January 24, 2007

The Democratic Response

 Or Jim Webb, Democrat

Senator Webb:   I’m Senator Jim Webb, from Virginia, where this year we will celebrate the 400th anniversary of the settlement of Jamestown – an event that marked the first step in the long journey that has made us the greatest and most prosperous nation on earth. 

Satan's response: Senator, what exactly made our nation great?  Socialism?  Giving up the fight when things get tough?

Senator Webb:   It would not be possible in this short amount of time to actually rebut the President’s message, nor would it be useful. Let me simply say that we in the Democratic Party hope that this administration is serious about improving education and healthcare for all Americans, and addressing such domestic priorities as restoring the vitality of New Orleans.

Satan's response:  We would "rebut" the President's message, if we had a plan.  Education, Senator, is a state and local matter, constitutionally speaking.  In terms of healthcare, you did listen to Bush's speech, right?  What is the President supposed to do about New Orleans?  The people reelected a worthless mayor, who couldn't even start up the busses to evacuate his citizens in the first place.  What would you have the President do, federalize New Orleans?  Because that is the only way you could end the incompetence and corruption that is sinking the city.  Remember, Satan knows vice...

Senator Webb:    When one looks at the health of our economy, it’s almost as if we are living in two different countries. Some say that things have never been better. The stock market is at an all-time high, and so are corporate profits. But these benefits are not being fairly shared. When I graduated from college, the average corporate CEO made 20 times what the average worker did; today, it’s nearly 400 times. In other words, it takes the average worker more than a year to make the money that his or her boss makes in one day. 

Satan's response:  On this point, Satan agrees with Webb.  America, to an extent, has returned to what Richard Hofstadter referred to as the "Gilded Age."  The fired CEO of Home Depot was recently given $210 million dollars to leave.  It is funny how companies can afford to spend $210 million on an incompetent CEO, but they nickel and dime their regular employees death.  There certainly is an issue of morality regarding corporate pay and responsibilities that Bush has not addressed.

Senator Webb:    And under the leadership of the new Democratic Congress, we are on our way to doing so. The House just passed a minimum wage increase, the first in ten years, and the Senate will soon follow. We've introduced a broad legislative package designed to regain the trust of the American people.

Satan's response:  Hell would like to point out something to Senator Webb.  You've just increased the cost of doing business for every company.  When the workers at the top end of the scale ask for a raise, what do you think will happen now?  So now some high school kid has a fatter paycheck, but there is no money for the long term employee....

Senator Webb:  I was proud to follow in his footsteps, serving as a Marine in Vietnam.

Satan's Response:  We thank you for your service, but a republic needs not only to judge a man by his past actions, but by his current deeds.

Senator Webb:    The President took us into this war recklessly. He disregarded warnings from the national security adviser during the first Gulf War, the chief of staff of the army, two former commanding generals of the Central Command, whose jurisdiction includes Iraq, the director of operations on the Joint Chiefs of Staff, and many, many others with great integrity and long experience in national security affairs. We are now, as a nation, held hostage to the predictable – and predicted – disarray that has followed.

Satan's Response:  Satan remembers both houses of Congress voting for this war and if Satan felt like it, could generate a list of of generals that supported going to war.  Exactly, how is this nation held hostage Senator?  We have lost only 3,000 soldiers in four years.  By your logic, this is disarray?  Is a nation of three hundred million people supposed to be brought to its knees by the daily death count repeated endlessly by the media?  Is our economy in recession because of this war?  Has the war in Iraq affected the lifestyles of 99% of Americans in any way, shape, or form?

Senator Webb:    The war’s costs to our nation have been staggering. Financially. The damage to our reputation around the world. The lost opportunities to defeat the forces of international terrorism.

Satan's response:  Yes, we've spent nearly $80 billion a month on this war, but has our economy collapsed Senator?  Are American's burdened by ever rising taxes to pay for this war?  And is the deficit continuing to come down, despite the costs of this war?  So, excuse Satan if he is a little confused.  

Next, Satan always loves how the left is worried about what other countries think about the United States.  Ever considered that France, the U.N., or Russia are morally corrupt and were rather upset when their contracts with Hussein's Iraq were terminated by our invasion?  And quite frankly, who in the hell cares what Syria, Saudi Arabia, Kenya, or some other corrupt third world nation thinks?  Only the left.....

Moving on, the Senator buys into the notion that invading Iraq has diverted our ability to fight terrorism.  Satan strongly disagrees.  Senator, you need to think strategically.  One, how many enemies have been deterred by the show of American might?  How many Arab nations that were funding fundamentalists groups quietly started to crack down, fearing the wrath of America?  Well, Saudi Arabia and Pakistan come to mind.  Two, Iran was a lose cannon before the war, already on their way to building a nuclear weapon.  Now we have front row seats, if we need to confront Tehran.  Last, Iraq has attracted jihadists from around the world.  They blow up things over there and they die over there.  That is much better than waiting for them to blow things up over here....

Senator Webb: The majority of the nation no longer supports the way this war is being fought; nor does the majority of our military. We need a new direction. Not one step back from the war against international terrorism. Not a precipitous withdrawal that ignores the possibility of further chaos. But an immediate shift toward strong regionally-based diplomacy, a policy that takes our soldiers off the streets of Iraq’s cities, and a formula that will in short order allow our combat forces to leave Iraq.

Satan's response:  The majority of the nation didn't support the Revolutionary War either.  Good thing the Democrats weren't running the Continental Congress.  And what is the Democrat obsession with diplomacy?  Did diplomacy defeat the South in the Civil War?  Did diplomacy win World War II?  Did diplomacy stop North Korea from setting off a nuke?  Did diplomacy bring the Palestinians to recognize the right of Israel to exist?

And if we "take our soldiers off the streets of Iraq's cities", who will keep the country from spiraling into civil war?  So let Satan get this straight, let's say we get Turkey (who hates the Kurds, the Saudi's (who will support the Sunni) and Iran (who will support the Shiite) to mediate events in Iraq and we withdraw our troops, what will we get?  Great plan Senator.  Satan will hang a copy of this one on his wall right next to the reconstruction plan for post WWI Germany.

Senator Webb: As I look at Iraq, I recall the words of former general and soon-to-be President Dwight Eisenhower during the dark days of the Korean War, which had fallen into a bloody stalemate. “When comes the end?” asked the General who had commanded our forces in Europe during World War Two. And as soon as he became President, he brought the Korean War to an end. 

Satan's response:  Senator, the war officially has never ended in Korea.  We signed a truce, not a peace treaty.  We still have troops in South Korea.  By your logic, our troops should have left Korea by 1960 and we should have left Europe by the end of 1949.  The child-like impatience that the left displays is a danger to this Republic.  War is a long term commitment.  

In conclusion, Satan would like to ask the Senator, if he so worried about world opinion, then what will our enemies think of us when American troops abandon Iraq under your plan?  Let Satan answer that, they will see us as weak, easily defeated, and every terrorist and terrorist state will be emboldened to confront the United States of America.  Yes, that is the Democratic plan, bring the battle to our shores!

Other takes on the State of the Union Address can be read at Hot Air, Right Pundits, Ankle Biting Pundits, Stop the ACLU, and Right Wing News.  Satan seems to be in agreement with these bloggers that the only plan that the Democrats have towards Iraq is utter American defeat and disgrace.